Announcing My Resignation…Sort Of

June 5, 2013

image copyright feverpitched 123RF Stock Photo

Today’s brief newsletter won’t provide you with any advice or words of inspiration. Well, not intentionally. You see, to be quite frank, I’ve been struggling A LOT lately and it’s time for me to make a change in my business to how I approach and deliver my newsletters.

In hindsight, I can see it’s been brewing for awhile, but last week it came to a head when I had a major breakdown and fell into a dark place where I was questioning everything related to my Feel the Possibilities world.

From the simple questions like:

  • Why am I not as inspired to do the things that once lit me up?
  • What value am I bringing to my readers?
  • Is this still what I want to be doing?

To the bigger, gnarlier questions like:

  • What is my life purpose?
  • Why do I feel so lost after all I’ve been through to get so clear?
  • How can I help anyone else if I’m such a mess?

Blah, blah, blah, blah. By the end I was so exhausted I sat crying in the hot tub telling the Universe I just didn’t care anymore (actually, I believe there was a lot of me saying “f**k it,” over and over again). It’s the first time in a LONG time I felt a sense of real surrender going on within my heart. (Reminds me of the phrase ‘Let Go and Let God’ that got me through some really difficult times in previous decades of my life…guess it’s time for a refresher course.)

If you’ve followed me for a while you probably know what I’d suggest when something doesn’t feel good: find a way to feel better. Whether that’s going for a walk, belting out a favorite song while jamming down the road, surprising someone with a thoughtful gift, or simply asking “What can I change right now that would relieve some of the pressure I’m feeling?

While I’m not clear about how my path may be shifting, I am clear that forcing a newsletter out every week isn’t serving you, or honoring the intention from which it was born. If that means changing part or all of my business, so be it (which is a nicer version of saying, “f**k it”).

For that reason, I’m resigning (sort of) and officially announcing I will no longer be sending out weekly newsletters. While I’d like to think I’d have a valuable message every 2-3 weeks, the truth is right now I just don’t know what this is going to look like. I’m still seeking answers, although now I’m doing it in a kinder, gentler way. (Meaning, I’m not berating myself for being lost, rather accepting this is what I need right now in order for the next phase to be as good as it can be.)

Thanks to the support and love of some beautiful people I’m lucky enough to have in my life, I was reminded of a few key truths, such as:

  • Nothing is as it seems
  • We have to breakdown to breakthrough
  • I’m not alone

In spite of it all, I’m acknowledging that I’ve always been the kind of person to feel fear, psych myself up, and then walk through it instead of around it.

image copyright wonderisland 123RF Stock PhotoThe good news is every day I’m feeling better and I know that is what will open the door to the clarity I seek. Till then, I’m taking it day by day… trying to follow my bliss… paying attention to the serendipitous signs that will let me know when I’m back on my path again.

Thanks for understanding this caterpillar needs some alone time. I’m sure I’ll evolve into a more beautiful butterfly, but first I have to survive the metamorphosis!

I wish you all the very best with whatever you may be going through (remember you’re not alone!) and I’ll talk to you again…in a bit…
image gif sara sig clear

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

karyn June 6, 2013 at 2:46 pm

Thank you, for all your posts but especially this one. I woke up this morning in a panic attack, the first in a very long time that I was struggling to break out of, and your post was the first thing I read, and a very salutary reminder/wake-up call. Serendipity, coincidence, whatever, I’m very grateful. Thank you, and all the best on your journey.

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Sara Russell June 7, 2013 at 9:23 am

I am delighted that by following my gut/inspiration/spirit, you were able to break out of your panic attack. It’s been a LONG time since I’ve had one as well, but remember how debilitating they can be. Much love and I’ll see you down the road a bit (whatever that turns out to be)!

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Geraldine Herrine June 6, 2013 at 3:22 pm

I wish you the best as you rediscover yourself. I look forward to your return with greater inspiration for us all. Why do I feel like you just described my current journey in my life. Selah.

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Sara Russell June 7, 2013 at 9:20 am

Glad to hear I’m in good company :) Here’s to both our journeys!

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Claire Knowles June 6, 2013 at 3:36 pm

Sara……Love you….all the time….all the ways…through thick and thin.
Sending BIG hugs.
And as the Universal Law of Allowance notes….we have to “let be”

Looking forward to the next phase of your metamorphosis!

Claire and Dick

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Sara Russell June 7, 2013 at 9:19 am

Ahhhhhh, that felt wonderful to read – THANKS Claire!!!

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Kathy June 6, 2013 at 5:28 pm

Sara,
thank you for delivering such an honest message. I’m sorry I haven’t commented sooner but I wanted you to know your newsletter is one of the few I actually read. its always positive, honest and inspiring. It is perhaps asking too much of yourself to write weekly so maybe switch to a monthly newsletter. I’m confident you have much to give to the world in service by following your passion and being who you
are. Sending peace and love your way.

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Sara Russell June 7, 2013 at 9:12 am

Yep, thinking of monthly…dunno…as we both know, something will reveal itself :)

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Rita June 6, 2013 at 10:01 pm

I will miss your newsletters but applaud you for knowing its time to make a change! I truly hope you find peace and serenity as you discover the next phase of your life. Everything has a season and I’ve enjoyed being a part of yours! May the next season bring nothing but beauty and light! You deserve it! You are a beautiful person! All my best … Rita

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Sara Russell June 7, 2013 at 9:13 am

Thanks for your support Rita, not just now – but every time our paths have crossed!

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